Understanding Temperament Therapy

Do you ever wonder how or why you can act and feel so differently than other family members or people you spend time with? Temperament Theory suggests that all people are created to function in their own unique God given way.

Psalms 139:13-14 tells us that God created our inmost being, and knit us together in our mother’s womb. We are fearfully and wonderfully made, and your (God’s) works are wonderful!

Because we are created individually and different, we also have a unique set of needs - and these needs are usually the driving cause for why we do what we do. We are constantly seeking to meet these temperament needs through one means or another. There are both healthy and unhealthy ways to meet these needs but one thing is true: we will work hard to get these needs met.

It was the Greek physician Hippocrates who developed temperament into a Medical Theory. For centuries, it was widely believed that there were four temperaments that existed: The Choleric, the Sanguine, the Phlegmatic, and the Melancholy. However, many people didn’t quite fit into these temperaments. In the early 1980’s, Doctors Richard and Phyllis Arno discovered and introduced a fifth temperament. This newest discovery was called the Supine temperament.

Historically, philosophers and great thinkers believed each person was primarily one temperament. The Arno’s believe each person has three interpersonal needs known as Inclusion, Control, Affection. Within each of these interpersonal needs are two needs specific to each temperament type. Here’s a quick overview of these needs.

Inclusion: Need #1: the need to establish and maintain satisfactory surface relationships. (association and socialization).
Need #2 our desire for wanting people to approach us for association and socialization.
Determines: Social interaction-whether we relate better to tasks or to people, and the impulsiveness of the behavior.

Control: Need #1: the need to establish and maintain a satisfactory relationship with people in regard to control and power.
Need #2: the need within the temperament measured by wanting no one to control our behavior to wanting everyone to take control over our behavior.
Determines: How well we make decisions, how well we carry out responsibilities, and how dependent or independent we are. The area of Control also determines how strong our will is.

Affection: Need #1: the need to establish and maintain a relationship with others in areas of love and affection.
Need #2: the need within the temperament which is measured by what degree one wants love and affection and from how many or few.
Determines: How many of our emotions we share, how emotionally guarded or emotionally open we are. This area also determines how intimate we are with extremely close people in our lives, and it also determines the depth of our feelings.

Every person can act outside of their temperament depending on environment and the learned behavior or "masking."

That being said, someone may score on the ARNO assessment as a pure Melancholy in Inclusion, Control, and Affection, another person could be a different temperament in each area. Once again, people aren't always just a single temperament, but many times are a temperament blend or combination. For example, someone could score as a Melancholy in Inclusion, Choleric in Control, and Supine in Affection. This individual would approach a few people for socialization and have no need for people to approach them; they would also possess great mental energies. They would also need to be extremely independent and take on much responsibility to accomplish tasks and receive recognition (with their Melancholy mind they would be able to envision their goals and how best to accomplish them, as well as having a knack for seeing obstacles and potential issues in their plan of attack, which could create hesitancy). Finally, because they are a Melancholy in Inclusion, they probably wouldn't have many deep relationships because they approach so few people, but of the few relationships established, they would require much love and acceptance. Though they would have a will of iron due to their Choleric in Control placement, their heart would be tender and somewhat needy, as indicated by their affection score. This is a very brief overview of someone who would have this temperament build. This in no way compares to fully explaining Temperament Theory, but I think you get the point.

This is a guiding principal of Temperament: The more one lives outside of their God-given temperament, the more stress that person experiences in life. In other words — the longer we live in the "masked self”, perhaps living in other’s expectations of us, the longer we cause ourselves pain, difficulty, and will likely participate in destructive behaviors. For example, someone who is a Melancholy in Inclusion would suffer great stress and exhaustion from living a lifestyle matching that of some who is Sanguine in Inclusion. Why? Because the temperament needs of a Melancholy and Sanguine are opposites. What energizes one, drains the other. Therefore, we must understand our temperament needs so we can learn how to meet them in a manner healthy to our soul.

Another reason for discovering our temperament profile is learning what our strengths and weaknesses are. Every area of temperament profiling includes strengths, weaknesses, and needs. The above listed individual would have numerous strengths such as being driven, independent, intellectually gifted, discerning, a natural in leadership, etc. But they might also be prone to weaknesses like anger, insecurity, fear of the unknown, and feeling unlovable. Note that there is no perfect temperament build, combination, blend, or type. All of us excel, suffer, and struggle in different areas, creating a level ground among us. The goal of understanding our temperaments is to help us sharpen our strengths, manage our weaknesses, and meet our needs in healthy ways.

Finally, Temperament assessment helps us to not only understand ourselves, but our spouses, future spouses and our children. Your temperament assessment is a great tool for engaged couples to better understand their future spouses. These assessments can also be used in the workplace. Becoming aware of our temperament as well as the temperament of those around us leads to a greater understanding of why people act and react differently to the people, places, and things in their lives. We are not created to be completely independent of, or totally dependent on each other. Understanding temperaments enables us to live interdependently with each other.

Are you ready to discover your God given Temperament?